The Cost:
2 primary care physicians
2 orthopedic surgeons
2 physical therapists
1 chiropractor
1 massage therapist
4 mental health practitioners
They all said the same thing, with minor variations in phrasing: If it hurts when you do that, stop doing that and are you crazy? That will be $300.
If I persisted in the madness and ignored their very simple and expensive advice, they prescribed a wide variety of very expensive placebos and worse, to wit:
(Disclaimer: Studies are like gravity-for every study, there is an equal and opposite study-otherwise researchers would be out of business)
Ibuprofen/NSAIDS-Studies I've read suggest this slows the healing process. Plus it masks pain so you go right back to what hurt you in the first place-doubling down on dumb.
Foam torture/Stick torture-Both of which are said to “break up the scar tissue.” For the purpose of, I presume, encouraging additional scare tissue to form over the old scar tissue. If someone has a scar on their skin, you don't scrape it off with a microplane. Whackodoodle.
Stretching-Studies I've read suggest that flexibility may be harmful to runners and may actually excacerbate injuries. There's a reason for rigidity-so when you're running, your knees don't completely collapse because they're so flexible. I do some light stretching-don't get me wrong, it does help-but it is not an end all, be all. And it helps prevent future injury-it does nothing for the current injury.
Hot baths-This one I like, but I don't think it's healing anything, just removing symptoms.
Ice baths- I'm already injured-I think we've established how tough, or not tough, I am-let's not push it by pretending that sitting in subfreezing water is somehow therapeutic (see above comment on studies).
Equipment-New shoes, bike fit, more new shoes, the right hat, a new bike, wetsuit, drag suit, aero suit, salves, super drinks, super food, tri suit, the right socks, shorts, tights, more this, less that, heavier, lighter, sturdier, disposable, expensive, expensive, expensive.
(I'm on the fence about whether shoe companies are the devil, but I'm leaning toward yes. Swish my ass, just give me a cotton short, shirt and shoes that stay on my feet and point me in the right direction. Yes, as a Portlander, this is heresy. If you worship the devil, that is. Sorry Phil.)
All of these things may help incrementally, but it still comes down to something elemental-If it hurts when you do that, stop doing that. Unless you make your living at your sport, or you plan on never doing it again after “the big race”, or you only have six months to live, why on earth would you persist in training when you're body is telling you, through pain, that you are causing damage to yourself? I can think of a lot of reasons, just none that are very good.
There are only a couple of actually effective injury treatments/preventives. Train slow, train long-a little pain good, chronic, disabling pain, bad. Muscle soreness that doesn't affect mobility, good. Joint pain and debilitating muscle pain-bad and very bad. If it's difficult to turn over in bed, you may have over done it. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you're way ahead of the game.
The only time I inflict serious pain on myself and try to ignore it is race day. But this is only a few times a year, not a few times a week.
The Benefit
5 marathons
5 half iron distance tris
1 and 9/10 (complete bonk with 6 miles to go in the run) full iron distance tris
4 olympic distance tris
3 half marathons
6 10ks
100s of hours of fun, satisfaction and subtle bragging.
And finally, fine, yes, I'm crazy. Who do I make the check out to?
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